Randy said you bang! R. Kelly instantly got a woody. Paula said you were unbelievable. Simon said you remind him of when Christina Aguilera was nice! OUCH - SLAMMER ON HAGUILERA! HELLOOOO? Am I the only one that likes Christina now that she is an official trollop?????? I say guess what Diana - WE WILL SEE YA REAL SOON! WHY? BECAUSE WE LIKE YOU.......................... M-O-U-S-E

1. JENNIFER HUDSON - "Imagine"

Our Silver-Jive-Turkey-Wrap has arrived straight outta the South Side of Chi-town. Fortunately, she ditched the sliver jump suit and graced the stage with a white leathery outfit. Simon said it reminded him of some naughty nurse fantasy. Well, nursey - I say go on out there and circumcise his wits!

Jennifer did just that! She did the unimaginable. She opened her mouth with a black-as-tar soulful voice and sang a white-bread folky John Lennon song. She started off sort of quiet which scared me at first. But, she opened up those pipes and I truly felt the harmonious life that the song yearns to express. After she was finished, this South Side sporty wept tears of joy as her dream to sing before America had finally come true. AWWWWWWWWWW! How could we not like her now!

Randy said it was not her best performance. Paula said she was shy. Simon said she was great tonight. I say the judges are completely deaf. Either that is the case, or Yoko Ono is camping out in their front lawns protesting the song with the Hare Krishnas.

Jennifer - while they are all jingling around in la la land I want you to listen to me. Imagine yourself in the top 12 - and the world will live as one! And honey - you ain't gonna be dreamin' either!

My Take:

I must say that I had mixed emotions about the new semifinal format. I actually enjoyed the tension of the contestants being locked away in a quiet room with only a piano to save them from a nervous breakdown. It was a great way to hear their true voices without all of the racket from the stage shows. Then again, I do enjoy the fact that we are seeing these kids sing in the usual format. This way, we are sure to get a top 12 that can handle this tempo. I think the producers finally got something right.

Overall the competition was pretty stiff. I can honestly say that they were ALL GOOD! None of them deserve dire ridicule. Heck, even pretty boy Matthew was good too. I am just glad he did not bring the General Lee onstage as a prop. I have a hunch though that he could shock us. With enough teenage girls into this gig, he may pull off the votes needed to advance.