OPINION

Should I Teach?

Written by Dirtgrain
Published January 25, 2004
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You can’t bring it home with you. When you have 160 students per semester, and you actually care about your students and get to know them, you will hear and see the effects of some horrible things: rape, abuse, neglect, molestation, murder, suicide, death, serious injuries, dreams lost or stifled, and on and on. The semester that I student taught, one of my students committed suicide, and a month later his best friend killed himself. That was an ominous start to a teaching career. Obviously, it was tough to deal with, and if I didn’t become a teacher, I may never have been put in a situation where I had to deal with such a thing. It had a big impact on my life overall. But I still value the experience. Despite the suicides (which I would gladly undo), there were things that I saw in the students and people with whom I was working that were positive, that showed what humans can do when they come together. We supported each other. Kids wrote honest, intense pieces; for some this was perhaps a first. That which does not destroy you. . .

Finally, I worked in several customer service jobs. “The customer is always right.” How many times did I want to pull a “High Fidelity” type of attack, smashing a cash register over a jackass customer’s head? To be honest, I still have the urge once in a while, but I learned long ago that no matter how hard I tried, I could not totally become a Vulcan. It’s that damn little bit of Captain Kirk that we all have in us. My current customers are parents (and students, but they don’t have as much clout). The part of my job that I hate the most is dealing with parents. Forrest Gump, box of chocolates. . . I have had to deal with some serious nut cases. When I ran the yearbook, I had a punk-ass bitch mother (finally I get to swear at her—blogs are awesome) calling me a mother fucker, asswipe, dickless moron (or words to that effect) because her son wasn’t in his team’s photo (what the hell I had to do with him being absent for the team photo, I’ve never been able to figure out). As when dealing with any customer, I had to be patient and calm, speaking to her in a calm-but-eerie, Nurse Ratched way. I hate being in this powerless type of situation; I hate having to be phony in not expressing how I truly feel when dealing with a parent. I’m just not good at schmoozing.

You have to put up with all kinds of parents: assholes, holier-than-thou prisses/jerks, fundamentalist religious freaks, Amway-pitching psychos (yes, I once sat through an entire Amway presentation that a student’s mother tricked me into), the Sybils of the world, people with severe problems in perceiving reality, and the list goes on and on. I don’t know why it is, but I am much better at tolerating crazy students than I am at tolerating their crazy parents. Maybe it has something to do with power relationships. I bow down to no student, although I try to treat them as equals (most of the time). I have come damn close to having been forced to bow down to a parent, and often parents have not treated me as an equal. I have caved in to some lesser demands just to avoid a time-consuming hassle. If it comes to me having to totally sell out and bow down, I don’t think I’ll do it. I’ll flip out (not in the fashion of High Fidelity or 187, but I will speak my mind); I know it. Hopefully my union would get my back. By the way, administrators rarely back up a teacher in such situations. Administrators usually fold in the face of any complaints or controversy. They have even changed a student’s grade without consulting me. I am on my own, and this is a bit disconcerting. On many occasions, I have considered quitting after having gone through a nasty parent interaction.

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Should I Teach?
Published: January 25, 2004
Type: Opinion
Section: Culture
Writer: Dirtgrain
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Comments

#1 — January 25, 2004 @ 15:54PM — Eric Olsen

This is heartfelt, practical, honest and overall outstanding. Thanks! We need teachers, but we need them for the right reasons.

#2 — January 25, 2004 @ 16:24PM — duane

Very generous and honest appraisal, Dirtgrain. I haven't taught at the high school or elementary levels, but I know people who have or that do. I have taught at the college level, which is much easier going. Let me second your opinion that it's not just the students that color the experience but also the administrative staff and the rest of the teaching staff.

#3 — January 27, 2004 @ 21:22PM — Dwaine AKA Scooter AKA D.J.

That was pretty good Dirtgrain. One question, what grades do you teach?

#4 — January 27, 2004 @ 21:29PM — Dirtgrain [URL]

I teach composition and literature classes to students in grades nine through twelve.

#5 — January 27, 2004 @ 21:54PM — Dwaine AKA Scooter AKA D.J.

Cool. I just wanted to know. I'm a high school freshman.

#6 — September 7, 2006 @ 23:55PM — carla [URL]

I am reading your book lives on the boundry and I am woundering if I could email you sometime.

#7 — September 8, 2006 @ 08:57AM — Dirtgrain

I'm not Mike Rose.

#8 — September 8, 2006 @ 10:34AM — Vern Halen

You're right - it takes all kinds. Glad to have you aboard, Dirtgrain.

#9 — December 30, 2007 @ 11:58AM — Brenda

I know that you wrote this forever ago, but I want to say thanks for writing it. It has helped tremendously, and I will make arrangements to sub:)

#10 — December 30, 2007 @ 23:59PM — Dirtgrain

Thanks Brenda. I just re-read it, and I wouldn't change what I wrote. I'm in my tenth year now, and I still like it (and suffer with it at times).

People tend to see substitute teaching as something negative. I think we can all remember when we had a sub in one of our classes--and a lot of kids planned on taking advantage. While I did have some tough subbing experiences before I became a teacher (and I still sub now and then during my planning period), I also had some great experiences. Even some of the bad ones are memorable.

I once subbed for a special ed. teacher at a middle school. In one class, I saw that she had three students. "Three students," I thought, "that's going to be easy." I was mistaken. The three students, Larry, Willie and Joe (sounds oddly like the Three Stooges), were the most foul-mouthed, delinquent seventh graders I have ever seen. They had to be escorted by a teacher from class to class. I was told to call immediately to call for help if they gave me any trouble. As soon as the escorting teacher left the room, these three kids start putting swear words together in combinations that I had never heard before. One of the kids walked right up to the window, picked up a book and threw it out the window. I didn't call for help. I was too stubborn. So, I did my best, and by the end of the hour, I had managed to get the kids to sit at the table and talk a bit about the assignment that they had. Nothing else was thrown out the window that day. I was shaken and drained after that one class period, but I felt a degree of success. That was my toughest substitute teaching experience.

A more positive experience came at another middle school, where I subbed for a music teacher. She had left me pages and pages of typed, single-spaced notes and instructions. It was ridiculous. I couldn't even finish reading them before class started. Before I knew it, I found myself in front of an orchestra of about twenty five girls, conducting them as they played through several pieces of music that they were working on. I had no experience in conducting an orchestra--only my own experiences as a choir student in junior high school. That didn't stop me, and while I made some mistakes (there's nothing quite like a group of twenty five middle school girls simultaneously getting pissed off at you for messing up on telling the bases when to come in), it was a great time for me. I don't think I'll ever get an opportunity to conduct an orchestra again.

#11 — March 17, 2008 @ 01:57AM — Kyra

I am currently going to school to become a teacher. I have encountered some difficult times that have made me second guess my decision. I've read books that are supposed to inspire me to become a teacher but they've achieved only the opposite. They encourage teachers to become revolutionists and to fight the system. That is not my intentions and your words have helped to light the flame under my feet again. I appreciate your honesty and your writing style. You should write a book... Thank you!

#12 — March 28, 2008 @ 00:53AM — Noemi

I have been debating whether or not I should go into teaching i've been thinking about i for a whole year. Today, I googled the question "should i teach?" and you're blog popped up. I received an answer. Although teaching has it's negative points, i believe your description is true and refreshing. Thank you for being honest and giving me a heads up as I continue the path to teaching! I agree with the previous comment. You should write a book if you haven't already:)

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