Goose: Well, what was the outcome?

Gander: My campaign was fined $37,000.

Goose: For misusing $110,000?

Gander: Yep.

Goose: Do you think a 30% fine is a good deterrent?

Gander: Deterrent to what?

Goose: To people misusing campaign funds. I mean, where's the punishment for breaking the law? Isn't that what you just said you do--

Gander: You'll have to speak with my campaign manager about this. I'm the idea guy, not the money guy.

Goose: Alrighty then. Let's move on. What's up with the judge in Detroit, Gander?

Gander: Well, seems there was a little good-natured shenanigans at a terrorism trial in Detroit. You know, "prosecutors will be prosecutors" and all that.

Goose: What happened?

Gander: I made a brief comment about how credible a prosecution witness was, after he'd finished testifying but before the trial was over. And now everyone's up in arms about it.

Goose: Why are people upset, Gander?

Gander: It's just the liberals, you know. Some of 'em say I broke two rules at once in the Detroit case. They say I'm supposed to follow the American Bar Association Rules of Conduct, which say that that prosecutors — and I'm the country's top prosecutor — are prohibited from opining about the quality of evidence in an ongoing case. So people are saying that I broke this rule.

Goose: That kind of sounds like a basic rule, Gander.

Gander: But it's not a law, just an ethical thing.

Goose: Oh, yes. Excellent distinction.

Gander: Unfortunately, the judge in the case had also instituted a gag order. That means nobody involved in the case was supposed to say anything to the media that could compromise the defendants' right to a fair trial.

Goose: And you made that comment about the witness, right?

Gander: Yeah. And I also said something about the three defendants knowing something about the 9/11 attacks.

Goose: Did they?

Gander: Uh, no.

Goose: So you violated the gag order not once, but twice? On one occasion you made an untrue statement about the defendants, erroneously linking them to the most horrific act of terrorism on American soil, and the other time you made a positive statement about a prosecution witness?

Gander: Seems so.

Goose: Is a gag order legally binding?

Gander: I suppose. But I just started a-flappin' my gums and one thing led to another. I realized that once people noticed I'd said something, it wouldn't matter because my words would be out there. They can't take back the words after I say them, you know.