Stepparenting: Not Quite a Parent

Written by Dawn Olsen
Published September 20, 2003

In some regards I am quite lucky in my role as stepmother to my two stepchildren. They are genuinely nice people and we have come to a relatively basic understanding of each other, but as new territory is crossed, the basic understanding must be retooled.

My stepdaughter Kristen starts college this week and gave us a call to let us know she finally has a room to stay in and her classes scheduled. It was kind of a tumultuous summer with her and now that she is gone I feel sad that we just didn't get enough time to spend with each other.

I had wanted to take her shopping for things she needed to start college off right, but lack of time and money put that on hold. I wish we could have done more and now it's too late. She is a sweet girl, but still on the border of adult-hood and teenage self-absorption. I know she will grow out it, almost everyone does, but the closer they get to being these amazing individuals, the deeper the disappointment when they make a mistake.

I have faith in her and my last warnings I passed on as her father was hanging up were "Don't let anyone slip anything into your drink and keep track of your valuables!" Not sure why those things crept into my mind, but I just don't want her to be taken advantage of. As though I can keep that from happening.

My stepson Chris turned 16 at the beginning of summer and finally got his driver's license. He is also a smart kid, who is typically good natured. He and I have rarely had any conflict in the eight years I have been a part of his life, but we are also very similar in personality. We WANT to get a long with everyone and keep things smooth, but sometimes our emotions take over and we blow a gasket. Sadly, he is probably better at handling his emotions than I am.

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Dawn Olsen is a veteran blogger who proudly supports the guy who publishes this awesome site. She's also an avid reader of high quality tabloid fare, enjoys gardening and scatological skywriting.
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Stepparenting: Not Quite a Parent
Published: September 20, 2003
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Section: Culture
Writer: Dawn Olsen
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#1 — September 20, 2003 @ 15:22PM — Eric Olsen

Those kids love, like, respect and cherish you Dawn, as well they should. You are probably still a better stepmother than mother (you've had longer to practice) and you're a great mother. They know how lucky they are to have you, and while they may take me for granted, I don't think they ever will you because they know everything you do for them is because you want to, not because you have to.

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