In a desperate attempt to draw viewers to it's network, Trio has sold out it's primetime schedule of Rowan and Martin reruns to annoying Joel Stein from Time magazine. In exchange for mention in his column, they have allowed him to program their primetime lineup. Stein has reached into TV's garbage dump to find the worst of the worst. With this stunt, Trio proves they will try anything to attract more than a few hundred viewers. The sad part for Trio is that more people will read this post, than watch.

Here is what Joel has come up with for his one week in charge:

Good Clean Porn - Porn minus the porn. I think they stole this from Satan's cable channel, since this is surely what you're forced to watch in hell. Would you watch Deep Throat without the sex? Didn't think so...

Idiot Savants - MTV quiz show in which four college-age contestants were asked pop culture questions by a wise guy host. Luckily 99.999 percent of the population has never heard or seem this clunker. The only apparent reason for it's inclusion is that a college-age Joel Stein was a guest.

Pink Lady and Jeff - If you're going to show crap you might as well go for the worst series of all time.

My Mother the Car - Jerry Van Dyke starts as a family man who discovers that his mother has returned from the grave as a 1928 Porter convertible automobile. I guess the talented brother was unavailable.

Battle Of The Networks Stars (1977) - Wide World of Sports meets Reality TV. This is the height of 70's TV schmaltz. Pay close attention to the T&A which ABC graciously highlights with skin tight outfits. Added bonus is that the Monday night football crew called the action.

It's an interesting alternative programing option, that is sure to attract viewers who enjoy train wreck TV. Note to Trio execs - I'm available to help...