After watching my DVD of M. Night Shyamalan's "Signs", I was reminded of how much it had affected my life. In Signs, aliens prepare for an invasion of earth by making "crop circles" in cornfields. Once here, they kill humans for food. However, the aliens have a fatal weakness: water. Contact with the stuff can kill them.

As you may know, I live in Iowa. I commute about 25 miles to work, over a country highway surrounded by cornfields. After seeing Signs for the first time, I quickly rushed to the local Wal-Mart to purchase a water gun. Specifically, I purchased a Super Soaker CPS 1200, a pump-action water blaster. I keep it loaded in my Civic.

Then, one night last fall, it happened. I was on my way home late from work. It was dark out. Suddenly, my car sputtered. It began to slow down. I pulled over to the side of the road, where the car died. I looked at the gas gauge. The needle was on E. Those damn aliens had telekinetically siphoned all the gas out of my car!

With trepidation I got out of my car. To my right was a huge cornfield. Looking around, I saw lights in the distance. A farmhouse--but it was at least a half mile away. I went to the passenger side of my car and got out my Super Soaker. If the aliens were going to get me before I made it to safety, I wasn't going down without a fight.

As I began my trek to the farmhouse, I tried to stay as far from the cornfield as I could. But then I heard a rustling noise in the cornfield. I felt myself irresistibly drawn to it. I cautiously entered the rows of corn. No rustling noise. I relaxed.