"Do you need an ambulance?"

"No, I'm okay, it just hurts, gaaah, ow. Hang on a minute, I'll be okay, it just hurts. Ow"

It's not too bad. It hurts but it's not shrieking agony, just like I got punched really hard in the back. I press on it and it doesn't hurt. No bones grinding, your feet work, you're okay, just a bad bruise and the wind knocked out of you. "Can you stand?" Yeah. I nod and stand.

I walk slowly back toward the trailer for debriefing. Everyone's concerned but relieved. Kelly, the chief jumpmaster, walks with me, staying by my side and reassuring me. He's a great guy. (Heck, all the guys at Sport City Skydivers are great.) But, I screwed up and I know it. I didn't do the things I knew I was supposed to do; I hesitated on my flare. Worse than that, though: I saw the ground coming up and me, and reacted to "protect" myself by lifting my feet up--and landed hard on my dignity at about 20 miles per hour.

Another student diver, a little more advanced than me, lands nearby. He's picture-perfect, light as a feather and on his feet. "Show off!" I yell, laughing. I'm okay. Jeez, hard to breathe though. I tell the other divers that I'll walk it off. It'll probably hurt worse in the morning. Just keep moving.

A couple of the jumpmasters express regrets that I had a bad experience on my first solo free fall. Everyone is concerned, but they're glad to see I'm walking around. They all tell me it's always a good idea to think about seeing the doctor after something like this. I let them know that I'm okay with it, that I just made a mistake and learned from it, and I indicate that I'll probably go see my doctor in the morning. Then I tell them about the trouble I had with the ripcord.

One of the senior jumpmasters, Gary, voice always serious, demeanor always rock steady, says probably I didn't grab the ripcord right and got part of the harness. "That is not at all unusual" he says, " it happens to a lot of people." I argue a little because I really don't think that's what happened; it didn't feel anything like harness material. But I'm not in the mood to argue. I only protest halfheartedly, then let the matter drop. If you keep arguing with him he'll just think you're a stubborn idiot liable to get yourself killed by not listening. And maybe he's right.