I always assumed the term "laptop" was figurative:

The previously healthy father of two remembered feeling a burning sensation after he had been writing a report at home for about an hour with the computer on his lap.

He noticed a redness and irritation the following day but it was not until he was examined by a doctor that he realised how much damage had been done.

"The ventral part of his scrotal skin had turned red, and there was a blister with a diameter of about two centimetres (0.8 inches)," Claes-Gorn Ostenson, of the Karolinska Institute in Sweden, wrote in a letter published in The Lancet medical journal on Friday.

Two days later, the blisters broke and the wounds became infected and then crusted but after about a week the unidentified scientist was "healing quite rapidly." [CNN]

If there is anything worse than a well-done winkie, it's a scorched scrotum. I believe it's time for a new name for "the computers formerly known as laptop."