To contribute to the big Blogcritics posting festival, I thought I'd drag out this old ditty. Anything to help!

I went to see The Stereo MCs, Live, and Jane's Addiction in concert. I learned much. I thought I'd share:

• Today's prevailing fashion trends include: leather pants, open back shirts, nonexistent shirts, and Halloween-esque black cat ears. (I wore jeans and a gray T-shirt. Me so trendy.)

• When you buy a "general admission ticket," you've just bought a ticket to be in The Mosh Pit.

• You must sign a release when you get to the stadium to participate in The Mosh Pit. (The very idea of a Mosh Pit is vaguely illegal to me, anyway.)

• A signed release stipulates that you, your family, and your estate will not sue.

• Black cat ears?

• The Mosh Pit is "not advisable" for pregnant women.

• Box office folk will exchange your Mosh Pit tickets for way-far-away tickets to accommodate your pregnant wife, but only if you grovel.

• As legally nervous as the place might be with their Mosh Pit waiver, they will serve alcohol to anyone, no questions asked.

• Any girl wearing black cat ears might as well be wearing a sign that reads "Hey Guys, Come Hit On Me!"

• You would think that a concert featuring a band that broke up in 1991, a band whose biggest album was in 1995, and a band no one ever heard of would have a slightly older crowd. Old Man Dave will tell you that's not true.

There. My life is but a experiment for others to learn from. Lucky you. Lucky me.