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An Open Letter to Jets Owner Woody Johnson

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Dear Mr. Johnson:

I have been a Jets fan all my life, but this Sunday, December 30, 2012, I contemplated almost the unimaginable: I thought about becoming a Giants fan. As my team lost miserably to the miserable Buffalo Bills 28-9, I kept switching channels to see the Giants winning their game big (42-7). That’s what great teams do, even if they are out of the playoffs – they win! I hate to break it to you, Woody, but the Jets are not even a good team. They stink!

Getting up and looking at myself in the mirror, I knew I could not wear a Giants cap, not now or ever. But the very fact that I even contemplated it tells you how far I have been pushed as a fan. For example, I am also a NY Mets fan, and never once in all the many years of suffering have I ever thought about becoming a Yankees fan. That would be like a vampire hugging a cross and chomping on garlic chewing gum. The fact that I even thought about becoming a Giants fan, even for a few brief moments, should put a scare into you, Woody.

So now I am going to give you in very apparent order the steps you should take immediately to save this team after it went 6-10.

1. Fire GM Mike Tannebaum. You have to start at the top, and anyone that thought Mark Sanchez was worth more than a plug nickel needs serious help. Let him get it elsewhere.

2. Fire Rex Ryan. The big guy has blown his opportunities here. He cannot be trusted to know what the truth is because I doubt he knows it himself. If you have listened to even one of his press conferences in the last month you will know what I mean.

3. Fire Tony Sparano. Yes, he was only as bad as the players he had, but he also seemed to have no clue about how to run an offense. As this last game against the Bills demonstrated, we look pathetic out there.

4. Trade Mark Sanchez. Trade him to anyone for anything. Even Joe Namath. Now!

5. Look in the mirror for this one. Tim Tebow – why?

Okay, this is a short list that could be much longer. I know that you are a busy man and have lots on your mind, but after this dismal season, your priorities have to be to get this team on track. I believe if you take these steps you will be heading in the right direction.

Oh, and I know Andy Reid of the Philadelphia Eagles will be looking for a job, but ask yourself if his 4-12 finish is anything you wish to bring to Gang Green.

Well, I promised myself I would keep this brief. Please understand that I know that this will be a heavy load for you to lift, but there is no other way to handle it. If you find rats in the basement, you have to clean them all out and seal up the holes in your foundation. Right now is your chance to do this and get it right. You owe it to your team to get your house in order, Woody; more importantly, you owe it to your fans.

 

Sincerely Yours,

Victor Lana
A Long-suffering Jets Fan

Photo Credits: Ryan – Reuters; Reid – AP

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About Victor Lana

Victor Lana has published numerous stories, articles, and poems in literary magazines and online. His books In a Dark Time (1994), A Death in Prague (2002), Move (2003), The Savage Quiet September Sun: A Collection of 9/11 Stories (2005) and Like a Passing Shadow (2009) are available online and as e-books. He has won the National Arts Club Award for Poetry, but has concentrated mostly on fiction and non-fiction prose in recent years. He has worked as faculty advisor to school literary magazines and enjoys the creative process as a writer, editor, and collaborator. He has been with Blogcritics since July 2005, has edited many articles, was co-head sports editor with Charley Doherty, and now is a Culture and Society editor. He views Blogcritics as one of most exciting, fresh, and meaningful opportunities in his writing life.