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America’s Ultimate Hate Crime?

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Every so once in a while I allow myself to consider the nightmare existence of a queer child growing up with religious fundamentalist parents. The thought of it is so painful that I need to keep it mostly compartmentalized and in the back of my mental and emotional closet.

It’s an aspect of the world of homophobia and fundamentalist religion that we very much ignore. For many reasons, it’s the forgotten stepchild of gay activism, child care services and the mental health profession.

But the obvious fact is that there are thousands of these kids living in a hell on earth as they fight their way through childhood.

I can think of few other situations that have the potential to engender such a relentless and pervasive environment of psychological and possibly even physical child abuse. Generally speaking we do not do a good job of handling child abuse in this nation but when it come to gay kids the picture is even bleaker. The ratio of gay kids to straight kids among runaways, child prostitutes and suicides, well documented by the CDC, makes this painfully clear.

Long before a child develops self-awareness of his or her own sexual orientation, he is trained to believe that homosexuality is an abomination and a perversion that is a threat to the American way of life.

In a fundamentalist religious environment, he is told that homosexuality threatens the American family and the sacred institution of marriage. He is told that homosexual activists and their agenda are leading the charge in a war against Christianity. The homosexuals are the enemy.

This young and impressionable child learns that the Bible, the absolute word of god and truth, clearly states that homosexuals are an abomination and that their sin is punishable by death.

And then, worst of all, he learns that homosexuality is a choice made by sick and evil people and that to make this choice is a very bad and wicked thing. But then nature takes its course and at some point the gay child realizes that he’s “chosen” homosexuality. He doesn’t remember being asked. He doesn’t remember checking off that particular choice on any application. And he searches through the mail for the recruitment brochure, but it isn’t to be found.

Somehow, somewhere along the way, he has made this monumental, life-changing and life-shattering choice, against his will and against the will of god.

No problem, he thinks, he’ll just chose otherwise until he one day realizes that he can’t. Try as he might, the gay just won’t go away, along with the color of his skin and the texture of his hair.

His intellectual and emotional energies become singularly focused on changing that choice but to no avail. He turns up the engines and works hard to hide his nature. Self-hatred begins to rip open his guts. Childhood innocence and joy are not part of his experience. He lives in a state of constant dread and anxiety, fearing exposure or worse.

It’s an exhausting and soul-crushing childhood. While other children are looking to the future with hope, he lives in a world of despair, pain and fear. While other children are considering being a ballerina, doctor, astronaut or fire fighter, the gay child’s energies are focused on hiding his or her true self. The boy dreads his first fake sexual encounter: will he be able to perform? The girl worries less, she will just turn away and cry and wait until it’s over.

Many ex-gays believe that the origins of homosexuality are to be found in an abusive childhood. Their logic is flawed but their childhoods were likely abusive. Many of them come out of strict Christian homes. Growing up gay in a strict fundamentalist Christian home most likely oftentimes means a battering patten of abuse, certainly verbal and sometimes physical. Many of these parents likely steam roll over the self-esteem and self-confidence of these children as they struggle to make “her” more feminine and “him” less of sissy.

Protected by a very misguided notion of religious freedom, fundamentalists of all sorts are allowed by our society to engage in the ultimate hate crime, a pervasive and monstrous form of child abuse that will one day be seen by social historians and anthropologists as a very barbaric and grotesque aspect of the American civilization.

Sexual orientation is not a choice, but our society’s willingness to tolerate this terrible treatment of children is a choice and a choice that should make us all ashamed. We will be judged harshly by future generations as we are already judged by more evolved societies on the other side of the Atlantic.

When slavery, the oppression of women and child labor were recognized for what they were, modern nations changed. When certain Biblical practices including the stoning to death of adulterers were recognized for what they were, modern nations changed.

And when the abuse of homosexual children was recognized for what it was, modern nations changed–tragically we were not among them.

Freedom of religion was designed to protect people from oppression and persecution. Instead, in 21st Century America, “freedom of religion” is used to do great harm to millions of Americans, including many of our children who are unable to defend themselves, their psyches and their hearts.

“Freedom of religion” should not, in my opinion, be used to excuse behavior that violates sound practices and standards that are based on science, morality and ethics. Further, “freedom of religion” should not exempt people from laws governing discriminatory practices, mental health care, child care and child protection.

If we allow religious beliefs to justify human degradation and oppression, we reduce our constitution to nothing but an old piece of paper.

Homosexuality is common throughout hundreds of animal species and every scientific measure that has been used thus far has confirmed over and over again that this is about nature and not nurture. Of course, people who act exclusively on faith and belief rather than on fact and reason will never be convinced of this. The facts are that dinosaurs and unicorns did not miss the Ark and gay children did not chose to be who they were born to be.

But the question that seems to plague us at every turn these days is whether we are to be a nation of fact and reason or a nation of people packed and ready to jump on the Rapture bus?

In the meantime, suffer the little children.

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About Ricky

  • JR

    Some of those children learn to question the assumptions handed down to them, they learn how not to be ruled by the prejudices of their families, and they learn to dismiss dogma and think for themselves. Those children receive a gift far greater than just a stress-free upbringing.

  • joseph

    It is a sin to be gay it say clearly in the bible.
    If you want to dismiss it as it is not then you WIll answer for it.

    also if you say religion sould not make the morals
    then what do you base it on? if you base it on evolution for example then you can do as you please this include rapeing, murder,theft ect…ect

    now also relize i do not this it is right to beat the child. I would sit down talk to the kid. I would not allow him to have sex with any gender until he is out of my house. Its his life and god will judge him justly

  • http://www.ladydragonfyre.com/index_files/LWS Lady Dragonfyre

    If one were to base morality STRICTLY on the notion of survival of the fittest and amorality, then yes, I agree with you.

    However, if one were to base morality STRICTLY on the bible, it’d be ok for men to physically punish their wives and children, kill or chop the hand off someone who steals, stone people to death for certain crimes, and hand down guilty verdicts if two witnesses say they saw a given crime occur.

    Obviously, few people follow this to the letter

    Joseph:

    also if you say religion sould not make the morals
    then what do you base it on? if you base it on evolution for example then you can do as you please this include rapeing, murder,theft ect…ect

    If one were to base morality STRICTLY on the notion of survival of the fittest and amorality, then yes, I agree with you.

    However, if one were to base morality STRICTLY on the bible, it’d be ok for men to physically punish their wives and children, kill or chop the hand off someone who steals, stone people to death for certain crimes, and hand down guilty verdicts if two witnesses say they saw a given crime occur.

    Obviously, few people follow this to the letter.

    It’s unfortunate that some Christians pick and choose verses from the bible to back up their own personal views, while disregarding the ones that don’t.

  • Lady Dragonfyre

    Sorry about the repeat; I went a little nuts with cut and paste.

  • http://www.nationalvanguard.com/ Richard Brodie

    It’s funny. When modern liberals want to argue that mental things like intelligence are not a part of mankind’s racial diversity, then they will claim that the mind is “tabula rasa” and intelligence differences are not inherited but instead depend on what a person learns from his environment. There’s no such thing as a parent “abusing” a “naturally” low IQ child by trying to educate him into being more intelligent.

    But when they want to defend perverted sexual behavior they turn a 180 degree about face, and claim that a mental thing like sexual “preference” is INBORN, and that parents who want to try and educate a “naturally” homosexual child to be sexually normal are monsters.

    This isn’t just inadvertent inconsistency. It’s downright intellectual opportunism, and it’s disgusting. Thank God America has not gone the way of other “modern countries” that are “more advanced” – advanced into degeneracy.

  • Clavos

    What’s wrong with degeneracy???

    I’ve given up drinking; I’ve given up smoking; I’ve given up fried foods, soda pop, carbs, unprotected sex.

    I am NOT giving up degeneracy–us degenerates have to make a stand somewhere!!

  • zingzing

    richard’s argument rings false. intelligence is an individual thing, not a racial thing. homosexuality is the same way. neither one can be changed to a very large degree.

    in fact, richard’s argument is pure bs. no one is saying that any part of human behavior (much less human intelligence) is 100% nurture. that would be silly.

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    This isn’t just inadvertent inconsistency. It’s downright intellectual opportunism, and it’s disgusting. Thank God America has not gone the way of other “modern countries” that are “more advanced” – advanced into degeneracy.

    I am a homosexual. I am not a degenerate. I am a human being entitled to all the rights afforded to me by my Creator and that Creator which is sanctioned by the American Tyranny. Americans are far from “advanced”. In fact, when the bombs start dropping on our soil and blood is shed in our streets, watch what happens. There will be anarchy, rioting and atrocities magnified a million times the Katrina aftermath. The survivors after the American conflagration will be the immigrants who came to our land to escape those very atrocities. They’ve got the experience. They know what it is like to be without food, electricity and other “simple” things in life. We spoiled Americans will be like caged rats scouraging around. We’ll be slaughtered and defeated and we only have ourselves to blame. Luckily this faggot knows a little bit about survival. And the fact that my partner is a survivor of natural disasters and rampant Russian oppression in Armenia gives me confidence in knowing that I’ll be one of the few Americans remaining after the shit hits the fan. Geesh. Who would have thunk it. I’ll be part of the Rapture! Go Queers!!!!!!

  • http://www.elitistpig.com Dave Nalle

    I’m not sure it’s any more wrong to raise a gay child in an environment of ignorance and bigotry than it is is to raise a striaght child in such an environment.

    I mean, think of the poor straight child raised in a same-sex partnership of doctrinaire progressives who’s told that half the nation is full of gay-bashing, knuckle-dragging, dixie-whistling, gas guzzling rednecks?

    Dave

  • http://biggesttent.blogspot.com/ Silas Kain

    Well, Dave, my straight children (all boys) dealt with having a gay Dad. It wasn’t easy. After all in the beginning I was one of those self loathing guilt ridden gays who hid behind his wife’s apron strings and tried to do the “normal” thing. My kids suffered for that. I’m not going to say that the transition from straight to gay dad was easy for them or me. We’ve been through a lot in the last 12 years. All of that being said, my boys love me nonetheless and have come to understand the nuances of my life. There’s even been acceptance and trust which is a lot more than I deserved for what I put them through. After seeing a healthy, gay relationship up close they’ve come to be very intolerant of those anti-gay elements out there who preach the Gospel of hate and fear.

  • http://www.nationalvanguard.org/ Richard Brodie

    I am a human being entitled to all the rights afforded to me by my Creator

    The only rights you enjoy are those afforded to you by the creators of the United States of America.

    There will be anarchy, rioting and atrocities magnified a million times the Katrina aftermath. The survivors after the American conflagration will be the immigrants who came to our land to escape those very atrocities … We spoiled Americans will be like caged rats scouraging around.

    We’ll see. I’d be curious to know in exactly what “superior” ways you and your Armenian “faggot” (as you called him) will be surviving the rioting of Mexican immigrants and African “Americans”, spoiled on WELFARE, when that spigot runs dry.

    You will be surprised at the resourcefulness of the descendants of those European Americans who created this country, particularly those who have availed themselves of the rights afforded to them by the Second Amendment. I suspect we will abandon the Hispanics to the southwest, the blacks to the deep south, and go about rebuilding the magnificent nation this started out to be, in our natural northerly clime.

  • Clavos

    Brodie,

    Who’s gonna collect your garbage and pick your crops?

    You’re welcome to the Rust Belt–weather’s too freakin shitty up there. You can have all those obsolete, money-losing factories.

  • Baronius

    “Many ex-gays believe that the origins of homosexuality are to be found in an abusive childhood. Their logic is flawed but their childhoods were likely abusive. Many of them come out of strict Christian homes.”

    Translation:

    Many ex-gays have proven my argument wrong, but I’m going to ignore it. After all, they were probably beaten up or something. Probably by Christians. So they don’t understand their own sexuality as well as I do.

  • http://www.elitistpig.com Dave Nalle

    The only rights you enjoy are those afforded to you by the creators of the United States of America.

    Good lord, Richard. Have you not even read the Declaration of Independence? Rights aren’t granted by government. Government exists to protect rights granted by ‘god’ or nature.

    “We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal. That they are endowed by their creater with certain INALIENABLE rights…”

    Inalienable means that government doesn’t grant them and cannot take them away.

    Dave

  • http://www.ladydragonfyre.com/index_files/LWS Lady Dragonfyre

    Richard in #5

    But when they want to defend perverted sexual behavior they turn a 180 degree about face, and claim that a mental thing like sexual “preference” is INBORN, and that parents who want to try and educate a “naturally” homosexual child to be sexually normal are monsters.

    Should a parent try to educate a heterosexual child to stay away from sexual acts deemed abnormal by mainstream society? Most parents don’t go there, because what their kids ultimately do with their boyfriends/girlfriends/spouses in the bedroom will be none of their business. All the parents I know care more about the type of guy/girl the kid dates, and whether or not they’re using protection. The mainstream world equates het relationships with love, trust, companionship, etc., and NOT just sex.

    Likewise, being homosexual does not simply represent a sexual preference, but an emotional one as well. Yes, there are truths in every stereotype, and the gay community as a whole has a tendency to perpetuate theirs; I certainly won’t deny that.

    However, I must point out that it’s also a lot easier to find homosexuals disgusting when you don’t think there’s an emotional component to same-sex relationships

    At any rate, my S/O and I have been together for two years, and friends many MANY years before that. I’m not the exception to the rule.