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American Tyler? Say It Aint’ So Steve

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So this is what Steven meant by “Brand Tyler,” then?

Look, I can forgive Aerosmith for participating in the Bee Gees’ legendarily rancid remake of Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band back in 1978…well okay, almost. Aerosmith’s version of “Come Together” was actually one of the few highlights of that soundtrack (along with Earth Wind & Fire doing “Got To Get You Into My Life”).

I’m also willing to give American Idol all due props for making the world a slightly better place by introducing us to the likes of Carrie Underwood and “Pants On The Ground” guy. Clay Aiken and Adam Lambert on the other hand, maybe not so much.

But one-time rock god Steven Tyler judging the world’s greatest karaoke contest each week on national TV? You’ve got to be kidding, right?

Well, let’s be honest here. Tyler’s own once mighty rock-cred has been in jeopardy for some time now. Theme parks and SuperBowl appearances alongside Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears aside, Aerosmith’s once mightily rolling train probably left the station for good back in the mid-eighties around the time they traded the cock-rock anthems like “Lord Of The Thighs” in for all of those horrid power ballads…and I’m not referring to “Dream On” either.

Speaking of “Dream On,” let’s talk about Tyler as a singer for a minute. Just how many decades has it been since he was able to hit those high-pitched screams on the aforementioned “Dream On” onstage anyway? That sarcastic giggle you hear is Simon Cowell laughing his ass off the first time Tyler has the stones to call one of his Idol hopefuls a little “pitchy.”

Speaking of Simon, whatever happened to all the talk of bringing Howard Stern on board to fill his chair? Whether you love him or hate him, there’s no doubt that Stern’s caustic personality would have made a better fit. Stern would have also added some much needed humor to the mix, at exactly the time this once unstoppable, now precariously teetering franchise could most use it.

As for American Ty-dol? Sorry Dawg, Not buying it. There, I Said It!

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About Glen Boyd

Glen Boyd is the author of Neil Young FAQ, released in May 2012 by Backbeat Books/Hal Leonard Publishing. He is a former BC Music Editor and current contributor, whose work has also appeared in SPIN, Ultimate Classic Rock, The Rocket, The Source and other publications. You can read more of Glen's work at the official Neil Young FAQ site. Follow Glen on Twitter and on Facebook.
  • “Just how many decades has it been since he was able to hit those high-pitched screams…”

    Please don’t tell me you’re suggesting that Tyler can’t sing better than most of these game-show contestants. I saw Aerosmith just a couple years ago and Tyler nailed the vocals on a range of classics, from “Seasons of Wither” and “Back in the Saddle” to “Dream On.”

    While I do believe he’s doing himself a disservice by this AI move, he can still sing his ass off. And that’s part of the reason this new gig is so ludicrous: He could upstage the next rocker wannabe on that show at a moment’s notice.

  • No doubt, Donald. But the last few times I saw Aerosmith (and I’ve seen them many times), he really struggled with “Dream On.” Just sayin’…


  • Anoynomos

    Steven tyler rocks and hes hot so dont dis tyler

  • Whatever you say, anoyonomos…lol…

  • ItsMyOwnOpinion

    I’ll take Clay Aiken any day over anyone you mentioned.

  • Davers

    Clay Aiken and Adam Lambert could both outsing Steven Tyler and Carrie Underwood too.

  • Dude. I love Aerosmith. Stephen Tyler is a GOD. Seeing them in concert results in me shredding my chords shrieking.

    But do not suggest that Adam Lambert does not make the world a better place.

    There ain’t a lot of people who can out-sing and even out-shriek Steven Tyler. Lambert’s at the top of that short list. He’s far more in Tyler’s mold than Aiken’s, and to lump them together because they prefer dick is ludicrous.


  • FUCK. Steven with a V. I know that shit. *facepalm*

  • cindy

    Hey I don’t care who are the judges on Idol, I enjoy the show and I am very happy that they brought the likes of Clay Aiken and Adam Lambert. Two people who can actually sing and entertain but in very different styles. Don’t care where they started but they are here to stay.

  • I could probably almost stomach Lambert (he does an impressive voice) if not for his way too over-the-top impersonation of a bad Freddie Mercury. As for Aiken, whenever I see him all I can think of is Alfred E. Neuman from MAD Magazine. But hey, it’s all just entertainment anyway, right? It makes for great TV, but it’s not like I’d actually buy a record by a karaoke singer…