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A “Victim” Who Likes It

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Sorry. I have little sympathy for those who appear on movie sets, all star-struck, and who later claim “sexual harassment.” To me, it sounds like sour grapes.

I’m not a body-builder. I’m not a male model. But I have been “sexually harassed” before, and guess what? It wasn’t so bad!

I’ve been “hit on” by gay men and straight women. Pretty moot to my eyes. If a gay dude hits on me, I set him “straight.” If a straight woman hits on me, I either indulge her fantasies (if she’s cute), or tell her I’m not interested (if she’s not). Easy enough. What’s the problem?

Little 18-year old bimbos who leave home with a one-way ticket to Hollywood should know what they are getting into. It’s fucking Darwinian. If you aren’t hot, sleep with the boss for a role. If you are, deal with the vulgar comments from your betters. That’s life in the big city.

Is it all fair? In the cosmic sense, no. But this ain’t the cosmos, it’s California. Arnold was a single, roid-raging body-builder. If he called you a “cunt” or played with your boobs, you should have notified the authorities immediately. Since you didn’t, you’re simply a shill for Gray Davis. And that, to me, is far dirtier…

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About RJ

  • I’m sorry, but you’re a fucking ignorant idiot who obviously has trouble with reading comprehension (or didn’t bother to read the article – you can use laexaminer for both username and password). And there is an article today on how the kind of behavior Arnold said he was sorry for is not common.

    How would you have reacted if one of these guys or women you had no interest in (who also happened to be strong enough to beat the shit out of you) grabbed your cock or ass? And was one of the richest and most powerful people in town?

    You’re saying that being a shill for Davis (which none of these women are – they probably have as much contempt for him as you – they also have contempt fo r Arnold based on experience) is worse than grabbing a woman’s breast or cornering her in an elevator against her will?

    These women did not “appear on movie sets, all star-struck, and who later claim ‘sexual harassment.'” And they did tell him no. He just didn’t listen (something he admits to now).

    One dates from before Arnold was even in movies and her ex-husband who was there at the time says she is telling the truth.

    Two were waitresses at places Arnold hung out at. Another interviewed Arnold in England and from the tape of the interview, he was hitting on her. One was a secretary at a movie studio and was in her 30s as was a crew member on Terminator II. And Eddie Furlong’s aunt and guardian on that set says that was Arnold was acting during the shoot.

  • Eric Olsen

    Two things: though sexual harassment CAN go both ways, it is still vastly more common for it to be directed by men against women, and it is still more about power than anything else. I’m not talking about flirting, or friendly joking, I’m talking about unwanted harassment. So it just isn’t an equal comparison.

    But just as importantly, what Arnold has apparently done, and more or less admitted to, is beyond harassment into gross imposition. Even if half the stories are half true, we’re talking about a very troubling lack of respect for women.

  • Eric, I’m in complete agreement, except for one thing. I think Arnold has a lack of respect for all people, not just women. 😉

  • Okay, fair enough. I’ll admit to having jumped to conclusions on this. I wasn’t aware of the specific details of the accusations (I’ve been too busy to follow events in California as closely as I’d like). I made the mistake of thinking “sexual harrassment” in this instance meant “vulgar jokes/comments” and a little on-set “slap and tickle”. I didn’t know we were talking about physically intimidating sexual advances and other more serious offenses.

    Still, these women had years (and in some instances *decades*) to make these charges public. Why wait until less than a week before an election to do so? The person most likely to benefit from these charges is Gray Davis (or perhaps Cruz Bustamante). That is why I referred to them as shills.

    Does that clarify things a little?

  • Eric Olsen

    That’s a fair point, but I think it’s more about comfort in numbers – like with the pedophile priest cases – than about shilling for a political candidate: more like, “Whoa, he did it to her too? I’m going to tell me story then.”

  • bhw

    Also, the women didn’t come to the media. The media came to them. Many of them still declined to give their names because they fear retribution in the film industry, where they still work. Others did give their names.

    I think this post points out how important it is to actually read about a topic before commenting on it. Don’t you think it would have been better to read the allegations people are making before calling them 18-year-old bimbos?

    From what you wrote, it appears that your opinion of women isn’t very different from Arnold’s. Those are some conclusions you jumped to.

  • bhw, those types of personal statements are part of what makes sexual harrassment such a tough issue about which to have a reasonable conversation. All research indicates that sexual harrassment has very little to do with gender or even sex, and everything to do with power. As I said above, Arnold has a lack of respect for most people, not just women.

    RJ, there are a lot of reasons why women don’t come forward in cases like this, and they’re not always immediately obvious. This might be a hatchet job on the part of the reporters or the newspaper, but the women, according to all reports, were reluctant even now to come forward. The shortened election cycle didn’t help, either.

  • bhw

    I guess I’m just astonished that in 2003, people still believe that men just give women what they were asking for by just being there, wearing those clothes, looking their way, or [insert your favorite cliche here]. And that women actually like it, but then cry harassment or assault when it suits their politics, thirst for revenge, quest for the limelight, whatever.

    This post was just so completely offensive women in general, not just the women who have alleged sexual harassment and, frankly, sexual assault by Arnold [yes, if you grab a woman’s ass or breasts without her permission, under or on top of her clothing, you have assaulted her sexually].

  • bhw, the amazing thing about life is that just because you get older doesn’t mean that everybody else is as old as you are. Different people have different experiences and learn things at different times or in different orders than others.

    Yes, the poster displays ignorance when asking in comment #4 why the women waited so long. And also freely admits to not having read the details of the alleged assaults. The sentiment expressed in the post, however, was far more common that most people will admit out loud. What’s the big deal about a little flirtation or verbal “harrassment?”

    While we can all get on our high horses and decry this sort of thing, and rightly so, we would be foolish to believe that this does not happen constantly, every day, in most office environments around the country. And a large percentage of the time, yes, people aren’t really offended.

    Groping as Arnold has been alleged to do, on the other hand, is always over-the-line. Always.

  • RJ – I don’t know if others do this but before writing, and then again before submitting an article I usually do a search through keywords of the topic here at blogcritcs and read what has been here before me. It can be handy to link up other articles to show that research has been done on the topic. Just a thought, not a slam in any way or anything.

    The issue about what happened was discussed thoroughly in another thread here which might be of interest.

    Hope this helps 🙂

  • You’re certainly right that I should have researched the specifics of the topic more before “mouthing off” and posting. That’s not something I normally do, and I will refrain from doing so in the future.

    As for the various personal attacks, I guess I just tend not to get offended as easily as some. For instance, when a female co-worker grabbed my ass a few weeks ago, I laughed it off. No harm done. Kinda boosted the ol’ self-esteem, in fact. Now, I would have preferred it didn’t happen, but it did anyways. And I wasn’t about to run into a corner, sobbing and yelling “sexual harrassment” and demanding her termination.

    I guess I’m just not a very big fan over the over-regulation of interpersonal relationships. This world contains all types of people, and some exhibit annoying behavior. If it becomes a big deal, make it a big deal. If it doesn’t, just let it roll off your shoulders.

    In a perfect world, these kinds of intrusions into our personal space would never occur. However, the world is far from perfect, and I see every likelihood that this will remain the case for the foreseeable future.

    Am I a cynic? Maybe. I prefer “realist”, but your mileage may vary… 🙂