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A Little Learning Is A Dangerous Thing, Part 1

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A little learning is a dangerous thing; drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring: there shallow draughts intoxicate the brain, and drinking largely sobers us again. — Alexander Pope

George W. Bush was an ignorant, grinning dupe of a President and led an administration of crooks, hustlers, and bullyboys that would have made Nixon grin and blush. He stole the presidency and lined his litter tray with the Constitution.

He continually snatched away the liberty and freedom which he swore to uphold and defend, playing on the fear of a rattled people.

He should be held without hope of a trial on suspicion of war crimes. I am glad he is now shuffling into the broom cupboard of history only to be let out once in a while, stumbling blinkingly about, grinning like a retarded monkey rodeo clown, arms too long for his torso, while incredulous Americans gasp with horror and wonder what the hell they were thinking.

The great American eight-year snooze of ignorance is coming to an end. The people are kicking the TV stuck on FOX news to the floor, brushing the Cheezit dust from their vests and clearing up the empty beer bottles from around their feet.

Now that Dubya’s gone, satirists across the world will look back on these heady times as their salad days. The days when they could run wild, free, and naked as long as they were making money. The Bush people hated satire; they didn’t understand it, but they understood if you were making money, someone was listening to you. Cartoonists have put away their Monkey and Lapdog sketch books and are learning to draw humans again. They sense a new reality dawning and it’s not run by a loon this time.

Whenever I saw him, I felt smart as well as sad all the at the same time. If I was an American I would have felt inconspicuous as well. It was proof of Hunter S. Thompson’s axiom — you had to stoop pretty low to be able to become President. Bush, Cheney, Rove, Rumsfeld mocked the American public with Satanic contracts sticking out of their back pockets, their souls long ago forgotten, their tyrannical reign practically unchecked by sanity or morals. Whatever was right was right, and that includes anything the president is told to think. And there’s no misunderestimating him and his holy knights.

There is no way you will be able burn these demons when they die because they have been conditioning themselves to be able to survive in hell since the '70s. Rove will oversee Satan’s first coming, of this there is no doubt.

The 43rd POTUS was born on July 6, 1946. During high school he was an unremarkable student but battled through the odds to become a lead cheerleader — perhaps this is where his burgeoning leadership qualities began. He predictably attended Yale, same as his Bonesman Father, George H. W. Bush, the 41st President. His father got him into the Texas National Air Guard where his attendance was irregular. He was a big drinker which resulted in a DUI conviction where he predictably served no time behind bars. He saw the light and gave up the booze after his marriage to Laura Welch, and his unsuccessful campaign for the House of Representatives in 1978. After this stint, there was a gubernatorial race where Karl Rove’s horned presence was first felt. Bush’s opponent, Ann Richards, was somehow smeared as a lesbian pushing gay rights, resulting in a win for Bush. He was a very popular governor and got his shot at the big prize in 2000 with the Republican nomination for President, running against Al Gore. He chose Dick Cheney as his running mate, plucking him from the obscure CEO position at Halliburton.

And this where the story really begins.

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About Simon J. James

  • Simon:

    I thoroughly enjoyed this article and look forward to Part 2. So there.

    PS: Bush seemed extremely simian-like to me.I apologize to apes everywhere.

  • Ruvy


    I also owe you an apology. But usually in an article written by a Brit you get some hint – a bit of local colour, or comments by a neighbour whilst talking about the lamentable condition of the housing estate – something that tells you this fellow is not native to the States. I really had to look hard, and found “Bonesman”, a term I suspect most Americans would not use. That was it!

    So, I have an excuse, albeit a thin one.

    You’ll rue the choice of your American cousins anyway. At one of the top dog conferences, Obama managed to talk your prime minister into mimicking his printing of dollar bills as though they were handbills announcing the opening of a new pub or restaurant.

  • If you are a Brit, Simon, welcome and make your acquaintance: two of our Comments Editors, Dr. Dreadful and Christopher Rose are your countrymen. And then, there is STM, Stan the Man, from Australia. On their behalf, the foreign contingent that is, I do welcome you.

  • @Roger – Dzi?kuj?

    @Ruvy – I read your blog and now know you’re in Israel, so apologies for lumping in everyone under the American banner. I am actually a Brit hence the ‘you guys..’ comment. I’m not sure the ruing will happen as yet, I’m looking forward to seeing how he manages the rest of the year.

  • Isn’t it neccessary to buy you guys out of the hock the banks and big corporations have gotten you into?

    No, Simon. We in Israel do not need you to buy anything. In fact, the Governor of our Central Bank, Stan Fischer, is basically your rag sheeny, buying up hundreds of millions of dollars daily to make sure the shekel does not appreciate.

    AS for the monkey remarks, Obama does look like a monkey – not because he is black, but because his ears are as big as jugs. But at least Bush was a stupid monkey.

    This dude is bad news – for you Americans. But it’s beginning to look like he isn’t so sharp, either. I don’t want to underestimate him, though.

    As far as race goes, the only decent thing about Obama’s election was that he is black – and it makes America look far less racist in the eyes of the world. If it had been any other black man, it would have been far better – even Colin Powell.

    But Obama got the nod, and you will rue that choice for a long, long time.

  • I wouldn’t say racist, Simon, unless professing Judaism as the only true faith would qualify as such.

  • @zingzing @Roger Really? Is this guy known for making racist comments?

  • “Monkey comments?”

    We don’t want to go there.

  • zingzing

    lumpy: “THey have to keep hammering on Bush to try to distract us from the failures of the Obama regime. Bush is the great bogeyman.”

    and clinton before him, and reagan/bush the first before him, etc, etc. do you see a pattern here? surely you must, unless you’re deaf and blind. or maybe it’s dumb i’m after…

    simon: “I’ll ignore the dubious monkey comments as I don’t think you mean that…”

    he means it.

  • I’m quite amused by some of the comments coming back at me.

    However, I should apologise that it is somewhat late but it was bubbling under for some time. It is meant to be a ‘note on the hopeful death of GWB’s political career’ as his career and influence could go on past the end of his tenure.

    Anyway, back to you guys:
    @Arch Conservative – I don’t care what Obama’s doing in the context of this article, this is about Bush. And, if you like, the legacy he left. And Obama a ‘Socialist Radical’? You should come to the UK sometime and see some of the loons in our parliament. THEN you’ll see just what sort of liberal Obama is. Also, do you actually think healthcare is working in the US?

    @Ruvy – I’ll ignore the dubious monkey comments as I don’t think you mean that but Obama’s spending? Isn’t it neccessary to buy you guys out of the hock the banks and big corporations have gotten you into?

    @Bliffle – Thanks for that, explains a lot.

    @Dave – I knew that much but is it more about his legacy and potential future aspirations.

    @Lumpy – Do you not think Bush failed too?

    @Cindy – Wise words, I shall take them under advisement.

  • Arch Conservative

    Apparently Simon doesn’t want anyone to pay attention to what Obama’s trying to do to this nation so it’s time to write a Bush bashing article.

    You can write 100 of these to no avail Simon. The worm has turned and your Barry messiah has been exposed for the socilaist radical that he is.

    He didn’t get his precious cap and trade and it’s looking very much like he’s going to fail in his attempt to have the government take over health care.

    I’d compare Barry to Icarus but Icarus wasn’t an arrogant, elitist, leftist dickhead from Chicago.

    1-1-10 RIP the leftist ambitions of King Barry the moonbat messiah.

    Even I never dared it would be over so quick.

  • Isn’t this article a tad late? The inauguration was last January, was it not? Now instead of a stupid monkey, you have another monkey, one with no more smiles for the folks, one who is spending you into penury faster than I can say Barak Hussein Obama, a fellow who needs beer to wipe awy the taste of feet from his own mouth.

    Bush is back in his shrub and the new boy is at the helm as the ship goes down.

    I’ll break out the cognac….

  • Bliffle

    Dick Cheney was never actually CEO at Halliburton; he fibbed on his CV. Cheney himself, in court depositions, admitted that he was never CEO, that he was a sort of Government relations Officer, using his influence to help swing deals but not having principle responsibility for strategic decisions.

    The truth came out in the lawsuits attending the discovery of $20billion of hidden liablity after Halliburton acquired Dresser Industries, for which acquisition Cheney gained tremendous bonus income and capital gains.

    Cheney made a lot of money by farking Halliburton and it’s shareholders, many of whom sued. The undisclosed nature of settlements may explain the wondrous no-bid contracts Cheney let to Halliburton when he was VP and was able to start a war in far off places.

  • Lumpy

    THey have to keep hammering on Bush to try to distract us from the failures of the Obama regime. Bush is the great bogeyman.

  • GWB is topical until he’s imprisoned for mass murder. They we can forget about him.

  • I’m afraid this article is just a bit behind the curve. Bush is already out of office.


  • Americans haven’t woken up at all. They’ve only switched from Fox to the Disney Channel.

  • Maybe he can share a cell with Obama in Bagram. I recommend indefinite detention without habeas corpus for them both.

    Bagram is worse than Guantanamo. I am incredulous that this is going on and on. People are as monstrous as I always thought they were. If only as a result of ignorance and selfishness. Anyone who isn’t acting to change this in whatever way they can is complicit in murder in my eyes.